Birthday ramblings

Yesterday was Bella’s birthday and today I feel guilty. I don’t feel like I did enough.

I shouldn’t feel this way, because it was her choice to use her party money to buy a tablet pc. It was her choice to get her present a week early so there was nothing to open on the big day. It was her choice to use cake money to buy a tennis racket. She doesn’t seem to be upset. But I still feel bad.

I guess it’s my chronic feelings of inadequacy coming back. I compare myself to my friends and see all the things they do that I don’t. I forget that they don’t have the same challenges as I do. I forget how far I’ve come in the last few years. None of my friends (except maybe on the web) have depression and ADD and are single parents of a kid with a chronic illness and ADHD. I just know that my baby had a birthday that was barely different from a normal run of the mill day.

I shouldn’t be so hard on myself.


About juvenilearthritis

A single mom raising a son with juvenile arthritis and a daughter with a big heart.
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2 Responses to Birthday ramblings

  1. turtle beach says:

    I’ve been absent for some time, but now I remember why I used to love this blog. Thanks, I’ll try and check back more often. How frequently you update your web site?

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